FINDING FLOW --- THE PSYCHOLOGY OF ENGAGEMENT WITH EVERYDAY LIFE
by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. BasicBooks, HarperCollins, 1997



    What gives you pleasure?

    How do you feel when you eat, watch TV, have sex, work, drive, socialize with friends?

    This book contends that you often spend your days unaware and out of touch with your own "emotional" life!

    As a result of this inattention to your own emotions, you find yourself constantly bouncing between two extremes --- inundated by anxiety and pressures during work and passive boredom and obligations during leisure moments.

    This psychological self-help book can help you reclaim ownership of your life. The key to success is to challenge yourself with specific tasks that require great skill and commitment.

    You can learn the joy of complete engagement by learning the "tools" of life-change. These seemingly simple "lessons" in life-change are really profound concepts based upon the author's lifelong commitment to the study of "flow."




      1) The "structures" of everyday life (p1-16)

        [1] Your "choice" is simple --- between now and your inevitable death, you can choose either "to live" or "to die!" Experiencing "flow" or intense involvement with the issues in your life depends upon your choice to really "live." That is, "flow" is the positive feelings you have when you choose to seek and to live a fully "engaged" or an "excellent" life!

        [2] You cannot expect that anyone will help you "to live." You must discover how to do it yourself! In this context, "to live" does not refer simply to biological survival, but it means that you choose "to live in fullness," without waste of time and potential, expressing your uniqueness, yet participating intimately in the complexity of the cosmos! (p1-2)

        [3] What can make your life "serene, useful and worth living?" Three main assumptions underlie the author's approach to this crucial question:

          (1) The first is that prophets, poets and philosophers have gleaned important truths in the past, truths that are essential for your continued survival (as expressed in the conceptual language of their time so their meaning has to be "re-discovered" each generation from the sacred bibles of each culture).

          (2) The second is that currently science provides the most vital information to humankind. At this time, science is still the most trustworthy mirror of reality, which you can ignore only at your peril!

          (3) The third is that if you wish to understand what "real living" entails, you must listen to the voices of the past, and integrate their messages with the knowledge that science or scientific truth (which is also expressed in terms of the world view of the times, and, therefore, will change) is slowly accumulating.

        Conclusion: "The only path to finding out what "LIFE" is all about is a patient, slow attempt to make sense of the realities of the past and the possibilities of the future as they can be understood in the present!" (p4)

        Now science shows that "how a person lives depends in large part on sex, age and social position. The accident of birth puts you in a slot that greatly determines what sorts of experiences your life will consist of." (p6)

        Unfortunately, there is no justice, nor any rhyme or reason, in one person being born into a starving community or with a physical defect, while another starts life with good looks, good health and a large bank account!

        So while the main parameters of life are fixed, and you cannot avoid resting, eating, interacting, and doing at least some work, humanity is divided into social categories that determine to a large extent the specific content of your experience. And to make it all more interesting, there is of course the matter of individuality or the "flexibility of human consciousness." (p7)

        If everything were determined by the common human condition, by social and cultural "categories," and by "chance," it would be useless to reflect on ways to make your life excellent! Fortunately, there is still enough room for personal initiative and "choice" to make a real difference in your life.

        And if you believe this assumption, then you have the best chance to break free from the grip of fate! (p7-8)

        Thus, "to live" means to experience --- through doing, feeling, thinking. Since experience takes place in "time," TIME is the ultimate "scarce resource" you have! (p8)

        Even though "time is money," money gets its value from time, since money is simply the most generally used counter for measuring the time invested in doing or making something. And you value money because to a certain extent it liberates you from the constraints of life by making it possible to have "free time" to do in it what you want to do! (p8-9)

        Everyday "LIFE" is defined not only by what you do, but also by who you are with. Since Aristotle, it has been known that humans are social animals --- both physically and socially. And cultures differ in terms of how much a person is influenced by others, or by the internalized opinion of others when they are alone. In other words, no matter how individualistic a culture is, other people still determine to a large extent the quality of person's life --- your life! (p13)

        And everything you do is ultimately not aimed at experiencing "health, wealth or fame" but happiness since it is desired for its own sake. (p18-19)

        Learning to manage your goals is an important step in achieving excellence in everyday life. (p25)

        When what you feel, what you wish, and what you think are in harmony, then you are experiencing "FLOW." The metaphor of "FLOW" is one that has been used many times to describe the sense of effortless action by persons that stand out as the "best" in their lives. (p29)

        It is the full involvement of "FLOW" --- rather than happiness --- that makes for excellence in "LIFE!" (p32)

      2) The "content" of experience (p17-34)

      3) How we "feel" when doing different things (p35-48)

      4) The paradox of work (p49-63)

      5) The risks and opportunities of leisure (p64-77)

      6) Relationships and the "quality" of life (p78-86)

      7) Changing the "patterns" of life (p97-115)

      8) The "autotelic" personality (p116-130)

      9) The love of "fate" (p131-148)

    NOTES (p149-158)

    REFERENCES (p159-168)

    INDEX (p169-181)

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